Yea well I haven’t written in this thing in quite some time now. But yea, seeing how there is not one fucking piece of god dam paper in this fucking house to rite on I am forced to come to you, dear online journal…. I no its sad, and I am not proud of this but I don’t know what else to do, I need to rite and you are here, and no one reads you so I figure you are my best bet. Also I am planning on deleting you soon anyway, I would have done it earlier but I forgot you were here. you no what? I never really let you get to no me So I was looking thru a couple of my old journals and I came across this, and I figured this best describes me I added and took some stuff out…..don’t ask me why I even bothered doing this, because I really have no clue. I think some things you do for no reason or you feel that you need to do them…… and this is one of them

• I am but a girl
• I think I might be anemic
• I have come to the realization that I am destine to be a lone. Ill be like that old lady with the cats, but seeing how I don’t like pets I wont even have the cats there for company
• I cant draw to save my life
• I bite my nails
• My favorite color is maroon
• Janis Joplin is my new found hero, if she wasn’t dead I would marry her and we would live happily ever after….but shes dead, so were not. That’s the kinda luck that I have
• I prefer the bottom bunk over the much popular top (don’t ask why)
• I have also come to the realization that my life isn’t going the way I want it to, and it pisses me off that im just letting it happen, but then again im not sure of what I want. Is what I want a good job that pays a lot of money? Do I even want to go to college? I mean is that what I really want out of life? Or was I brain washed from school and society into thinking that is was I want?
• I over think everything
• I hate that
• I don’t watch T.V. that much anymore.
• I consider my self an individual (but then again who doesn’t now a days?)
• I have lost most of my friends to their boyfriends
• I got promoted in work so now I get out by 1 on the weekends but for what now? I have no one to hang out with
• I have been told that I am very sarcastic. I don’t know why?
• I like to no why something shitty happens to me in 3 year intervals
• In the last couple of days I have been getting this gut wrenching putrid vial  feeling of loneliness
• Depression has started to sink in again
• That pisses me off that I have been come so sad and pathetic for no reason
• I dont think that I belong in high school, I  no it sounds a little snotty… but I believe that I am a lot more mature then the people that I am surrounded by
• I don’t know if I am happy with my life or if it is a complete load of shit
• So my parents are getting a divorce, of course its not official yet but I am pretty dam sure, seeing how all my mother talks to me about is how she hates my father…yea its fun
• I wear stockings under my jeans (it keeps you warmer)
• It think its about time to get new pair of cons
• God do I hate romantic comedys
• I saw napoleon dynamite and I must say that I am the only person I no that didn’t hate it and didn’t love it, it was alrite
• I wear glasses, because my mother doesn’t think that I am responsible enough fro them but I can handle waking up going to school(most of the time) and getting to work all on time o and keeping my grades up, but I could see why she doesn’t think that I can handle little wet plasticy thing.
• I have noticed that I don’t really have any hobbies
• That makes me sad
• Idk what it is about a flannel that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside
• But I like it
• I wish I was more artist
• I hate how every time i get close enough to smell my engrained smoked saturated rite hand it just reminds me how weak I really am.
• I hate how I just hope things will come my way instead of looking for them and doing something
• I would like when I hang out with guys that they would treat me as an equal, but that is never going to happen
• I dont no if it bothers me that I am the voice of reason for most of my friends
• i wish I wasn’t so disgusted every time I look in the mirror
• I would be nice for some one to actually find me beautiful and actually mean it (I no that was really stupid and I feel really gay for saying it, but its true)
• I wonder if true love really exists
• I wonder what I am going to be when I get older
• How old am I going to live to
• Am I going to be friends with any one that I no now? (prob not)
• Where am I going to live?
• I wish I was smart or maybe not, because you never see sad stupid people, there always happy, so maybe I should wish for stupidity
• I need to find someone that I really connect with idk what it is, but there is something missing from all my friendships
• I really wish I was someone’s first chose when it comes to hanging out or anything
• Idk what my problem is, I guess im just in a bad funk, but some days im fine and then others… well, they suck.
• I need to stay busy, I always need to do something because if I don’t I think. And thinking is bad
• I hate thinking
• I wish I wasn’t so boring
• The only make up I really wear is eye liner
• I finally move my starry night poster from above my bed… it got to hard to look at the stars every night knowing someone else was looking at them too
• That’s good, I have moved on
• i will be 18 in a month that’s so weird
• I just got done reading go ask alice
• It was good
• I am having a really hard time dealing with people lately
• Any love for the human race I had….well it no longer exists
• I get to leave school at 1 35 everyday for the rest of the year!!! I love having a 9^th period study
• I don’t have a favorite meal
• But I am very found of orange chicken
• I am one of the biggest procrastinators I no
• I bite my nails. A lot
• I don’t know if I should even bother posting this

By:

Robin

hey guys, yea i no that i said that i was only doing this for mel, but now im doing it for mel and the motherfuckin Jaywalkers. yea so come here to find out whats up with them, or go to the website. www.thejaywalkers.net. and after shows, come here and tell me what you thought. well thats it for now.

By:

Robin